


Things Ghostbur Doesn't Want To Remember

by Mirkachu



Series: Ghostbur Fics That May Or May Not Be Set In The Same Timeline [2]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Ghosts, Angst, Dream Team SMP Spoilers, Family Dynamics, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Ghosts, Memory Loss, Post-Manberg-Pogtopia War on Dream Team SMP (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:07:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27821236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mirkachu/pseuds/Mirkachu
Summary: Ghostbur gives up on remembering everything, but that doesn't mean he still doesn't have to deal with what his past self has done, especially since Fundy doesn't want to forgive him.
Relationships: Floris | Fundy & Wilbur Soot, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit
Series: Ghostbur Fics That May Or May Not Be Set In The Same Timeline [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2035897
Kudos: 67





	Things Ghostbur Doesn't Want To Remember

**Author's Note:**

> My ghostbur brainrot and teenage angst side is showing whoooops. If u gave kudos to this work i would appreciate it very much <3 hopefully you like this one.

One of the things Ghostbur remembered was bullying Tommy.

He was surfing trough his mind again that day, like he always did every afternoon. Getting even fractures of your memories back takes time and focus, and it's hard for Ghostbur's mind to not go off on tangents that get him nowhere at all.

Tommy checked up on him like he always did, after that one time he found him crying over his book and quill he got concerned and throwing the ghost's door open to ask him if he's alright became both a habit and a routine.

Then it came to him. He doesn't know why, but something about making fun of someone came to his mind while he acted like there was a spider on Tommy even if there wasn't one. He connected the lines soon after tommy left with angry stomps and muttered curse words. He wrote it down next.

While he was on his Daily Remembering Session™, he found out more about himself too.

He only remembers things that made him happy. It was a theory at first, one of the explanations for why he forgot so much that was stored away in the back of his mind, but after remembering a whole 2 pages worth he realized all of his memories have one thing in common: He was very happy.

Techno and him sparring together as children? Him getting chased down a grass field, as he hopped over rocks and laughed with his whole heart? Phil taking him down to a cave to let him learn something new and shielding him from monsters he couldn't quite take down himself? He was happy during those times. Niki made him happy, bullying Tommy made him happy too. 

Even as Philza stabbed a sword through his chest, he felt happier than ever before. 

He doesn't remember the bad things he did in his past life, but it's probably better that way. He would rather live with a warped illusion of this corrupted place rather than know the true pain everyone had to go trough. He wants to be happy, and only that.

 _Now he thinks not remembering isn't as bad anymore_.

* * *

He gave up on trying to remember. If he doesn't remember it, it's not worth his time.

Now he spends more time with his friends, he likes hanging out with them. Tommy's more closer to him than anyone on the server, but no one seems to be suprised.

He tried patting his son on his back the other day while he was keeping himself invisible to scare him, but his hand just flew right through Fundy's back and it sent shivers down his spine. That's how he found out he isn't solid to everyone.

He can interact with some things, like his potions, building blocks he got himself and the books he keeps close to his heart. Even if he isn't trying to remember anymore, he always liked books and reading them.

He can't touch some people. At first he thought it was because he doesn't remember them, but he remembers Fundy. He remembers how happy he was to see him grow up.

That's something he can't quite figure out, but maybe it's not supposed to make sense. He's tired of always trying to figure everything out. He's tired of how everyone always expects him to remember so much, it's unfair.

_He doesn't want to remember._

* * *

His son has been acting weird. He tried to talk to him but he seemed so down and uncomfortable the whole time, like he was hiding something. It made him feel uneasy, he felt like there was a storm coming and everything was going to go to shit.

What if Fundy hates him? What if he did something to him? He doesn't know what he did wrong.

One afternoon, Fundy came to talk to him.

Ghostbur was just looking over the river that always traveled around L'manberg, he admired how pretty it was. The clean and cold liquid was reflecting the sun's light and it looked beautiful.

_But all quiet moment must come to an end._

"Wil- Ghostbur?" He heard a voice from behind him. He knew who it was, so he didn't need to turn around to make sure.

He heard heavy leather boots make their way over to him by slow and small steps, Fundy seemed nervous.

"Yeah?" Ghostbur had an itch to turn around and look at his son, but he didn't want to. He was afraid what expression would have taken over his face, so he just continued gazing at the beautiful river before him.

"I wanted to talk to you," Fundy's steps faltered as he came to a stop and sat down next to the spirit that was calmly resting on the cliff over the stream of water. He adjusted his position on the grass that was on the left side of Ghostbur, trying to make himself more comfortable though the invisible weight over his heart was making it hard for him to be.

Ghostbur stiffened, that wasn't a very comforting sentence. A pressure started squeezing his lungs and his breaths got uneven.

"What did you want to talk about?" He tried his hardest to make his voice sound calm and collected, but if Fundy looked right into his worried eyes he would have known it was all just a lie.

"Is there anything going on?" He added with a concerned tone and glanced at Fundy for the first time. He expected for him to look tired, but he looked awake enough. His mouth was set in a slight frown and he was looking downwards at the same place Ghostbur was admiring before.

"No, not really," Fundy sighed, "but it's still important."

Ghostbur calmed down with relief yet at the same time got even more anxious. What was going on? Did he make a mistake?

"Well, you better tell me what it is then," Wilbur awkwardly smiled and stopped trying to hide how he really felt, it didn't have any use anymore.

_"I'm going to get adopted."_

The world stops. Ghostbur's sholder's shot up in shock and eyes widened but he stopped moving.

What?

"What?" Ghostbur whispered the question under his breath. If Fundy wasn't right next to him, he couldn't have heard what he said at all.

"By Eret, I thought about it for a very long time and thought it would be the best option for me," Fundy's voice got quiet and hoarse as if he was in pain. He looked to his right and stared right at Ghostbur, waiting for a response.

"But-" Ghostbur opened and closed his mouth. He didn't know what to say in a situation like this.

"But why? Am I not right here?" He stared back.

"It's-" The last time Ghostbur cried was over a week ago

"It's hard to explain," but he feels the pressure on his eyes, them watering.

"But I just- I just thought-" Fundy stuttered while trying to pick the right words to explain why. This guy didn't even fully remember who the fuck he was and he's supposed to tell him all the horrible things he did.

"Take your time." There was a tear streaming down Ghostbur's face, maybe he always was a silent crier. He smiled the most reassuring smile he could while he was obviously upset and reached to put a comforting hand on Fundy's back, only to realize he can't. His smile was wiped off of his face.

"You- You were a good dad, you know? You raised me well and I had a good life despite mom leaving but- but you changed. One day you decided I just wasn't as important anymore. One day you decided you were a bad guy and stuck with it. You blew up the entire country. This excuse of a place to stay? In shambles because of **YOU**!" Fundy got more and more frustrated. Why can't his dad understand? Why did he never understand?

" I can't just forgive you for all of that. Even if you're someone else now I just- I- I- I just can't." Fundy looked down and held back tears of his own, he couldn't cry right now, not here.

"Okay, I'm sorry Fundy, you- you can find a new dad." The shaky words felt bitter on his tongue, but it was the right thing to do, the right thing to say. Why does he always have to say the right thing? Why did he have to get put in a world that was already in shambles?

"O- Oh okay." Fundy was suprised as he looked up at Ghostbur, he thought he would get a different reaction, an angry one or a sad one or literally anything else other than that. He was confused.

Ghostbur sighed. He's tired of everything. He's so fucking exhausted _._

The ghost balanced himself on his arms as he stood up, as quickly as he can despite how tired he was. He turned and walked away without looking back, he can't stand to stay there for any longer.

He never sat on that cliff again, it was never safe anyways. 

_He definitely doesn't want to remember, no matter how hard anyone makes him try to._   
  


* * *

Ghostbur speed-walked towards the entrance of his cozy home. He fought off tears that were threatening to re-emerge on his face once again. He felt a sharp pain in his chest as his breathing got shaky and quick and as his fingers shivered.

He threw open the door to his room, a thing he has seen Tommy do, but has never done himself before. He closed it after himself and walked back to the furthest corner in his house.

He leaned against the stone wall and slowly slid down, trying to even his breaths out but he failed yet and yet again. He always fails. He was never a good dad, a good leader, a good friend. He was always a manipulative prick with ill intentions.

He just wants to feel okay. He just wants to feel happy again. He wants to forget everything. He felt so much happier when he didn't know, didn't know about the shitty things he chose to do in another life.

He heaved heavily like he just ran marathon. Tears were streaming down his face and he wasn't aware a ghost could cry this much.

He wishes Tommy or Niki was there, they're the only people that can hug him. They make him happy.

No one was there to comfort him, because deep down they knew they hated him. Deep down everyone fucking hates him.

 _He wishes he could forget everything again_.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, that was pretty angsty if I say so myself. If you want to check out my art accounts (and maybe scream at me idk idk) then my instagram is @an.actual.miriam and my twitter is @ActualMiriam


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